Friday 11 October 2013

Illness, no work and so its well and truly grinding today

Hello All,
Well after a few years of living comfortably in a lifestyle where I managed to have a few luxuries – by luxuries I mean the off treat of a box of maltesers, the odd looksie in a charity shop without having to worry too much about the odd few quid I was spending in my purse – it looks like the purse strings are about to be tightened, super-glued and welded shut for a while
I have been suffering from labyrinthitis for the last 9 weeks….its one on the nastiest bugs I have ever experienced…. dizziness, nausea, sickness, major increased anxiety, tinnitis, ear pain, deafness, sore throat, lost 2 stone in weight through lack of appetite, agoraphobia, and an intolerance of strip lighting, computer screens and crowds which all sent me spinning in a minutes notice. I couldn’t walk my son to school at the beginning of it and now I can actually wait in the yard to collect him and put my daughter in and our of nursery without feeling bad. Only downside is that any virus / cold that I contract – it can reoccur – what fun!
So since then my work basically said they had hired more staff and given them my shifts, this means I will be given new shifts as they gave them my contract so I will be put onto whatever they need covering which is impossible with a 9 year old, a 3 year old and a partner who works from 8 – 5.30 and works away occassionally. Therefore I either accept the new shifts I am given or can hand in my notice. :(just how you expect to be treated after 8 years old very rarely being off ill. I was bringing in £260 (after my loan was taken out)
I tried to claim employment allowance support or whatever its called – but they keep rewriting asking for more sick notes so I feel like Im flogging a dead horse if Im honest.
Tax Credits changed my working status to unemployed since Sugust when I got taken ill – so my tax credits went up from £202 to £375 which was a bit of good news.
We are in a battle with HSBC over reclaiming bank charges, and have just written to the financial ombudsman for the complaint for after getting the letter a few days ago from the bank saying they wont pay despite us having good reasons and suitable ‘financial hardship’ grounds……fingers crossed on that one
Image 
We had to take out a ‘loan’ from a well known site ( W***a ) as I couldn’t afford to buy food and the cupboards were empty and by empty I don’t mean a load of I cant be bothered to cook that and there’s no easy meals empty, I mean a bag of pasta, flour, golden syrup, tin of sweetcorn, smash and rice empty, and very little in the freezer to the point I can see most the bottom……this has never happened before. I took out £200 with the idea of paying £112 council tax and £80 shopping with a few pennies left……..didn’t turn out like that – I spent £48 on a dentist fee, £87 on shopping and had to give Owen £50 for his car petrol for the week and the last £15 – Ben needed £6 for a school trip, Holly needs £1 snack money for the week in school so I have literally about £5 left.
I have asked for a council tax/housing benefit form, hoping to get that filled in and sent back ASAP
My partner Owen like I said works and brings in £260 a week after tax etc.
So between us we get (with benefits at present) £1545 every 4 weeks.
Our outgoings of 
Rent  ~ 370.00
Water ~ 66.39 
Council Tax ~ 112.00 
TV ~ 20.40
NTL ~ 90.00
Gas ~ 49.00 
Electric ~ 40.00
Loan (Wo**a) ~ 234.00
Loan 2 ~ 40.00 
Dentist ~ 16.68 
Bank ~ 10.00 (28th each month)
Holly Nursery ~ 4.00
Ben – Cubs ~ 8.00
Owen Petrol ~ 160.00
Owen Loan  ~ 70.00
Food ~ 200.00 
Josh Maintenance ~ 100.00
————————————-
£1590.47
so we are over…..and thanks to Owen’s bank taking charges when they shouldn’t have , it meant our car didn’t get taxed last year, subsequently got clamped, fined and had to pay nearly £400 so I had to take out a loan with a credit union to the tune of £850 to get our car un-clamped, mended and taxed which I’m paying off at £40 a month from my wages – which I probably wont have much longer. Also because the tax wasn’t paid he has been given a court order which he is pleading guilty too obviously so he will end up with a fine/charges of some sort for that :( :(:(
Image
I have no savings. I am trying my best to take up Avon but I am in a relatively poor area with lots of working class families but it is bringing me in about £20-£30 a time but it is better than my shop work job as I don’t have crowds, strip lighting or computer screens to trigger dizzy spells and can do it at my leisure to a degree
I asked my dad his opinion (my dad is a round, hard working , ex RAF man) and he said if my tax credits have increased by £170 – I would literally be £90 short of my wages that I could use. So he said if I can save 22.50 a week – then that would cover the £90 a month
Besides Avon I am crafting with items to hopefully sell at a craft fayre coming up in November, I cook from scratch. I will list kitchen items soon but bare in mind I literally did my shopping yesterday so have to make this stretch until the 22nd.
Also in the £200 food spend – this includes 2 dogs (JRT and a mongrel of the same size – they eat what they are given), 2 terrapins, and I am currently looking after my neighbours 3 ferrets as she has had a few personal issues and cant care for them but will be having them back when she is fit. She has provided food/bedding etc so these do not need any of that expense. Oh and 3 gold fish.
I have been through old DVDs and plan to put them onto a various site to see if I can cash them in as they are no longer needed, I also have books that I’m sure I’ve seen a site to sell them on which I might try.
I am hopefully picking up a sewing machine on free-cycle today once Owen finishes work (the owner took it apart as it was dodgy and catching, and then reassembled it wrong) so I’m hoping to try and fix it so I can make a few crafts and Christmas presents for family.
I am looking for tips, advice and will keep this up to date with what I’m going to be doing over the next few weeks to try and get us back on track.
My mission for today is to list what I have in my fridge/freezer/cupboards and go from there.
*** On a side note I had a message from Swalec that we are £136 in credit with our Gas bill, and I owe £27 on the electric but Im thinking rather than claim it back that it will be worth keeping myself in credit for the upcoming winter months ***
Hope your all well and any input most gratefully appreciated.
Sammy
x x x x x

Thursday 27 June 2013

Having issues........

Hi All

I just wanted to update yo uall and let you know that I have been having health issues since my brother passed away in April.

I have changed my other blog to help me try and find some sanity again with it and maybe a bit of therapy

I hope youll come over there and see me and help with the healing/coping process

thanks all

Sam
x

A Year To Refind Me


Friday 7 June 2013

Time to make a change.....

Hi All

I realise I have been somewhat absent since the passing of my brother. Its been a very long few hard months but I think acceptance takes time and whilst I realise that he is no longer here, I know he is forever here with me and now we have his plaque and a date for scattering his ashes I feel better, knowing I have a private place to share my thoughts and fears with him, whether he listens will be another thing but at least to me it will make a difference.

Right not much has changed the last month or so other than I have piled on weight and its made my mood more miserable and depressed so I am making a point of this being the first thing I change about myself.

My other brother is a fitness fan so has sent me a copy of P90x which quite frankly I tried the ab ripper for the first time today at about 2pm and I can still feel my muscles aching from the workout and it is now 9.34......especially in the obliques area (which is the muscle down the sides of your stomach) my brother told me the first time he tried it he had problems walking properly as the muscles in his groin ached and after I attempted the first workout my legs felt like jelly so I will definitely stick with this because it was hard and in the 15 minutes I did boy did I sweat so Ill make sure to update you with how that goes and my starting weight for those who care was 12st 4lbs.....

Anyway so yeah I have that to do daily now, also I have decided to take up medication as a way to clear my head and have been listening to a few calming folk songs - I particularly like Sleep Song by Secret Garden..... but I am looking for more songs to add to my list that I can just sit and enjoy.

I have also created my own little nook. I came to realise that as much as I love my kids, they are my world, occasionally I need five minutes to myself or away from Owen to just enjoy my things.....so Owen's mum was getting rid of an old arm chair last week which we rehomed and put into our bedroom, it now sits in the corner, with a view ot the window into the street, the sunshine shines in and the terrapins swim quietly in the tank watching you, its calm and peaceful, I have a lamp, a place for my tea and a comfy chair......bliss. Just need to get around it cleared more so I have my own tranquil little place to relax and then find some things to do and enjoy. Lord knows I have plenty of things to read and crafts I want to do.

Apart from that not much else has happened, oh yeah my sister is pregnant again, she doesnt intend to keep it. I was sent home from work ill with some horrid bug which wasnt nice and had to borrow £500 off my dad to get my car unclamped and fixed and re-MOT'd

Im now waiting on a credit union loan to see if I can pay my father back so Ive emailed them tonight so hoping to hear from them tomorrow. x

x x x x x

Friday 10 May 2013

reading part two............

My reading was finished off today

She talked about my future a bit but it is very long so I will crop and paste the conversation here instead. 

*********************************************************************************
Conversation started Thursday

12:06
Sam :
hi Simone x

12:10
Simone:
Hi SAM ,I'm going to grab my cards and note pad OK

12:10
Sam :
OK Hun, that's fine x

12:16
Simone:
hi huni
:0)

12:16
Sam :
hello 

12:16
Simone
OK can u send me a few recent photos in box here please

12:17
Sam :
do they have to be specifically of me?

12:18
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
im reading you so yes please huni

12:20
Sam :
(pictures of me)

12:21
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
that's a nice one 

12:21
Sam :
thank you x

12:21
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
can i have a couple more please huni

(more pictures)

12:26
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
right im just linking in with your pics

12:26
Sam :
OK huni x

12:28
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
OK I'm going to explain how i work huni, I'm going to throw alot of random words etc at you and some will make sense some will not right now, then I'm going to elaborate on them
then ill introduce the cards for future details
OK
what i need you to do
is

12:28
Sam :
right OK

12:29
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
confirm what i tell you as and when Ive said it OK
but don't respond until i say OK
:0)
OK

12:29
Sam :
OK, so just write OK to say Ive understood? or it I understand it?

12:34
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
so you are a very interesting being ,this is a good thing , you are an old soul I'm sure you know this, you have been here a few times before this life, i feel you were placed in this family in this life and as most old souls feel they don't quite fit in , i feel you have always felt different ,i wouldn't want you to try and fit in with anyone huni, you are an intelligent old soul, this has given you psychic ability spiritual insight in this life which is a blessing so always trust it and use it in a good way which i know u would.
i feel there have been past issues to the point where it has affected you long term, i feel over the years you have tried to change your identity almost, its like you feel a new person when you change your look or ways, i feel you do this subconsciously, its like multiple personalities
but this way people can accept you for limited time then you have a fresh change then people forget some of that person and and its like a fresh start

12:35
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
do u understand what im saying huni?
i feel you limit friends, because people don't always get you

12:36
Sam :
yes

12:36
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
OK thank you huni
now come the random words I'm given for you
lol
salvation army / army/ air force <<< most my family is in the forces - air force and army specifically and Ive been looking to help the salvation army and food banks for the last few months

mental health issues <<< Myself, my mother and sister suffer panic attacks and I had a mental breakdown last year, my mum has also had one previously and my sister is currently seeing a mental health nurse regualrly 

widow <<< several widows in my family and in spirit

horses <<< my granddads grandfather was a coachman for a wealthy scottish family and we have a picture of him leading the coach in his photo album. Myself, sister, auntie, mother nad cousins have always ridden and my sister was  trainee Jockey and Frankie Detorri's stable hand briefly.

incest <<< I have no idea

12:38
Sam :
ok

12:38
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
sorry i know that some of the words are not nice
but i have to be honest and say what im given OK huni
one second

12:38
Sam :
yep x

12:38
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
poppy <<< my best friends dog, also they grow in my garden and rememberance sunday is very poinient in my family for my great grandfather a WW veteran

Dora or Doreen <<< my great aunt is called Doreen 

Phil <<< several Phils in my family both male and female
one second

12:40
Sam :
ok x

12:45
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok when i look at your photos u have given me to look at i feel uncomfortable with men, like i dont want to draw attention to myself ,do you understand that? give me feed back so far and then il go on :0)

12:46
Sam :
Yes, I can understand that and much of what you said before about limiting people and not fitting in. x

12:47
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
what about the last part huni

12:47
Sam :
Yes, I really dont draw attention to myself and I do feel very uncomfortable around men x spot on there

12:50
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
if i hit on something that's really important you must say cause then i can go into it abit more
we haven't got much time see cause ive got another reading at 1.30

12:51
Sam :
ok x

12:51
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
with the random stuff
did i hit on anything that's important?

12:52
Sam :
um......the mental health issues and the widow?

12:53
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
i feel there has been mental health in your mums side of the family , i feel you can be vulnerable in this area too, but you have great inner strength which u don't realise yet ,as you get older you will realise this, i feel you can get real lows
and then highs

12:54
Sam :
wow. spot on. x

12:54
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
but i look at you and i always feel a loss, a feeling you don't belong
does that make sense
ok

12:54
Sam :
again, spot on. x

12:55
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
i want to reassure you Sam there is NOTHING wrong with Sam, you are struggling with a very common issue for people who are spiritually aware and have old souls
i completely understand being the same
dont ever try and conform
you are you and you are very blessed

12:56
Sam :
Thats spot on aswell. I have had a few comfort issues with being spiritually aware.
Can I ask about past life's in this reading?

12:56
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
the reason you don't feel u belong is because you have lived in the past where things were so different ,for example the Victorian past life i see you in you had lost a love ,you had passion and
romance
you were desperately in love with a man
who didn't come back from either war or being away
you waited a long time for him
he never returned
so you have loved and lost
in that life

12:58
Sam :
Wow.

12:58
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
also
one sec
i need to get that connection again with your photo

13:00
Sam :
ok

13:00
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
there is another past life i see
really clear now
i see you were a scullery maid in another
you were treated badly
you were raped
im sorry i know that's not nice
but i felt i should mention
you were abused generally
and suffered a horrid life

13:01
Sam :
no, that's fine. x

13:01
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
i see another
i see you were royal
hang on

13:02
Sam :
wow

13:04
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
i cant get who you were but i have a clear vision of you with a soft cotton head cap on and a long dress
il google an image to see if i can get some idea
to show u

13:06
Sam :
ok. 
can I ask if a certain place bears any relevance to a past life?

13:12
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
yes go ahead huni?

13:14
Sam :
Ive had several dreams since I was very young about Auschwitz, the concentration camp and I can see myself walking around it......and I'm aware that I am a child - about 8-10 and possibly male.
and can you get any names from my past life's?

13:14
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
definitely male yes
i saw a male life
yes

13:15
Sam :
ok. Its always the same dream, no further.

13:16
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
so theres 4 past lives right there
so u see how difficult it is to fit in now?
if you dream it then that is definitely one of your past lives
how sad that you went through such horror
:0(

13:17
Sam :
wow ok. 
Also the soft hat makes sense - I have a fascination with having my head covered - whether its by a hood / snood/ scarf etc
yeah they don't sound the best past life's, unreturning love, raped, POW, .......
can you possibly get any names?

13:18
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
yes in those times you were not allowed to show your hair until you were older or special occasions
your hair was covered allot

13:18
Sam :
yes

13:18
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
if the names pop in my head then il give them for sure ok huni

13:19
Sam :
thank you. x

13:21
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
right im going to do your cards now huni
im shuffling a minute

13:21
Sam :
ok thank you

13:28
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
just want to ask u something first

13:28
Sam :
ok

13:28
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
i had a future vision of you on a farm,
is this now or not?
if not now then its definitely coming up

13:29
Sam :
No, but it has always been my dream to have a farm or a small holding with a animals

13:29
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
:0)
well dream no more huni
that's what you will have i saw it clear as day

13:30
Sam :
Just need to get it now. x

13:30
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
without the cards i see 2 older boys
so im assuming they r not yours
maybe step sons
in the future
i say that
because

13:31
Sam :
there are two older boys who I class as family who aren't though.

13:31
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
they r older
one begin with J
?
josh
?
Joseph
something like that

13:32
Sam :
I have a step son called Josh, hes currently 12

13:32
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ha ha oh wow
ok
that's the one then lol
there is another boy to come then
u have a girl?

13:32
Sam :
and I have a son of my own so that would be two boys....

13:32
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
oh wow
yes true

13:32
Sam :
and yes I have a girl too

13:32
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok
im seeing the boys having a huge part in the farming

13:34
Sam :
ok

13:34
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
right bare with me

13:35
Sam :
ok

13:36
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
huni my other lady is screaming at me
im going to have to do your cards tomorrow im afraid
i promised her 1.30
is that ok?
we have been hour and half so il have to go do hers

13:37
Sam :
yes that's fine hun. Do you want me on at the same time? 12?

13:37
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
i can finish yours tomorow same time
yeh
that's great thank you :0)
xx

13:37
Sam :
thats fine by me Simone - no problem at all.

13:37
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
thank you xx

13:38
Sam :
No problem, and thank you for the reading. x x x
**************************************************************
12:06
Sam :
hey simone x

12:08
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
hi huni :0)
im grabbing a coffee
il be right back ok xx

12:09
Sam :
 no problem x

12:24
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok huni im here
im shuffling your cards
where did i leave it after do u remember?

12:25
Sam :
you gave me a little bit about past lives, told me a bit about myself, and said you had a future vision of me on a farm and that was where we had to finish it x,

12:26
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
excellent thank you

12:26
Sam :
that's ok

12:27
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok so im going to read what first comes up in the cards and i need u to tell me if this is current stuff ok huni

12:28
Sam :
ok

12:29
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok i see there has been someone connected to you worrying about earning more money and being conscious of earning extra money and being dishonest about it, my opinion on that is if you can earn a little extra and keep it quiet do it
because we live in a time were life finances etc is very challenges
and we need every bit we can to stay afloat
as long as its not hurting anyone
and its not illegal
go for it

12:30
Sam :
that sounds like my partner. so Id say current

12:30
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
great thanku
im seeing a battle of wills and opinions between you

12:31
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
like u want to do things one way he another

12:31
Sam :
yep current. Id rather be honest and he doesn't mind letting things slide. His theory is what people don't know wont hurt them etc....


12:32
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
im also seeing an adviser regarding conception <<<my aunt had a coil checked after a year, my cousin had her contraceptive injection and my father in law went to ask about my nephew needing help (see later in convo)
im also seeing a lust with same sex relationship between 2 women

12:33
Sam :
wow Ive no idea with that one........

12:34
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
there are lies regarding your childhood linked to your mum, feels like you cant get all the answers

12:34
Sam :
yes

12:35
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
im seeing that you are going to be the secret keeper regarding the lovers with 2 women
u are going to feel trapped or restricted
with info thats told to you
and its as if you wished they had never tld u

12:35
Sam :
?? right, as in someone will tell me about it but I cant tell anyone?

12:36
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
yes

12:36
Sam :
ok

12:36
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
you are going to want to do a course but your worried it will cause problems
its classed as further education course could be part time or less

12:37
Sam :
yeah

12:37
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
in the healing bracket
whats the course?

12:37
Sam :
yes
Elderly Care and nursing but its awkward as I need to be in a position of care to take it so Id have to leave my current job

12:37
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
excellent
natural healer as i said :0)

12:38
Sam :
 yes

12:38
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
yes its all about timing
is there an elderly lady in hospital at the moment related to you or yr partner??

12:39
Sam :
No I have an elderly lady attached to me who has just been receiving treatment in a hospital though but she is poorly again at the minute (but shes at home at present I believe).

12:40
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok im concerned about her
i feel she is or was being mistreated or neglect
?
who is she to u?

12:41
Sam :
My grandmother

12:41
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
this lady holds secrets that need to be released before she passes
she is your last hope for the information u need about childhood

12:42
Sam :
ok

12:42
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
is she mums mum?

12:42
Sam :
yes

12:42
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ave u asked her?

12:43
Sam :
No

12:43
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
why not huni?

12:44
Sam :
I wasnt sure she'd know the answer. (Im a completely different blood group and body shape to the entire rest of my family)

12:44
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
huni i know allot more info but i just dont no if i should completely go there

12:44
Sam :
No Im happy for you too

12:45
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
before i do id like a family photo or some of your mum etc?

12:47
Sam :
Ive got old ones? but I may have a recent one. Thats a recent one of her but maybe a few months old

12:52
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
you and abby have different dads?

12:53
Sam :
Not that I know of...... but we dont look alike

12:53
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok well im feeling different dads, you are right you are nothing like each other not in looks or person
you dont look anything like your mum
you do look like your dad tho
who r u closer to?

12:54
Sam :
No not at all. We are like polar opposites myself and Abby, and Im much closer to my dad than my mother. Me and my mum are estranged from each other

12:55
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
have u ever asked your mum?

12:55
Sam :
No there was a bit of a running joke though when I was concieved that my dads best friend was staying with her at the time because my dad was away

12:56
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
thats wat is confusing me, because u dont feel connected to your mum at all
yet you do with your dad
are u te eldest?
r u older than abby?

12:57
Sam :
No not at all. Me and my mum have never been close.
Yes Im the eldest and older than Abby

12:57
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
cn i ring u for a minute?
send me mbl

12:58
Sam :
(numbers)
house phone if thats easier

13:20
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
do you no of a holiday thats booked for august / september time huni?

13:20
Sam :
one thats being booked yes

13:20
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
is it yours?

13:21
Sam :
yes

13:21
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
excellent well rest assured that holiday will happen :0)
your cousin whats her job?

13:21
Sam :
ok, thats good.

13:21
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
cause im thinking it could b her pregnancy?

13:21
Sam :
she is in telesales

13:22
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
and her partner?

13:22
Sam :
oh she was a cashier though in a supermarket

13:22
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ha ha

13:22
Sam :
until last week

13:22
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
its her pregnancy coming up

13:23
Sam :
ah nice

13:23
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
tell her from me :0)

13:23
Sam :
I will 

13:27
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
some confused mixed feeling with your sister coming up
i feel she will feel let down re the wedding plans
i feel it will be from a relatives lack of support
i feel there will be unfairness
allot of indecisiveness re mums relationsip again
thats taking over your cards for a bit there
so thats going to be a big deal
i feel you will have a new friendhsip with a male who there is still allot of judgment on

13:30
Sam :
wow, um I think I can undersgtand the lack of relative support too. possibly from my father

13:30
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
people always judge and gossip

13:31
Sam :
a new friendship or a reoccuring friendship?

13:31
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
there is medical intervention coming later in the year for one of the bys
has one of them got a medical condition?
or is this vaccinations maybe?
its something where they both have to go anyway

13:32
Sam :
Oh not that I know of......  Josh may have boosters

13:32
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
show me a photo of them uni would u

13:36
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
im seeing you or your partner will have one disappointment with a job but one will come up at later stage so it will work out ok

13:37
Sam :
My partner did go for another job when he was leaving his previous one but nothing came of it, but then the job he is in now came up so he started there instead.

13:38
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
no this is later in the year huni
ok
so either u or him

13:38
Sam :
ok

13:40
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
im feeling the step son more may have some confidence issues?

13:41
Sam :
yes he does.

13:41
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
and sometimes sadness regarding friends in school?

13:41
Sam :
yes.

13:42
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
i feel like he may have aspergus
cant spell it
i could be wrong
it may not be that drastic it could be an ellement of it
but something wit confidence and wanting to be left alone on times
he needs hhis own personal space
has he got his own room?

13:43
Sam :
He doesnt have aspergers but he has all the symptoms of it yes.
He doenst have his own room in our house but in his own he does

13:44
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok huni so extra sensitivity towards hhim is needed
ok
he needs his own space too thats really important
bbut they are both lovely boys

13:44
Sam :
Yes, if he needs space he is given it x

13:44
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
:0)

13:44
Sam :
Thank you. x
Randomly as I wrote about aspergers a toy fell off the top of my fire on the other side of my living room.....Im easily 3.5meters from it and theres only me and the dog sleeping next to me in here and no open windows ..........

13:45
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
theres going to be a fall out regarding a friendhsip , the fall out will come due to a jealous girlfriend

13:47
Sam :
oh ok

13:47
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
during a marriage break up later in the year there will be arguements over the money side of things
ha ha oh fab
spirit with you lol

13:48
Sam :
I know Ive gone very tingely as well. x

13:49
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
as the relationship separates with mum later in the year with her partner i feel you are becoming more drawn towards making the steps towards contact with her again

13:50
Sam :
right.....

13:50
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
im also seeing coming up end of year a young pregnancy for someone who by then
will be going into further egdcation

13:52
Sam :
hmmm.......ok.

13:52
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
who is in comp?

13:52
Sam :
my nephew

13:52
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
yes
how old?

13:52
Sam :
16 in july. he may be linked to that pregnancy x
and he has aspergers x

13:53
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
he is
the pregnancy linked definitely
right im going to leave your cards there huni

13:54
Sam :
thought so

13:54
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
il connect with spirit
now

13:54
Sam :
ok, thank you love x

13:57
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok im getting Gregg and Bert, im seeing a man who preeched allot
just say yes or no as to wether u can take it ok huni

13:58
Sam :
No.

13:58
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok
im going to stay with this man
see if you recognise some of it

13:58
Sam :
ok

13:59
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
ok he has a fishing hat on
he liked birds to
he wore glasses
he had something wrong with his stomache

13:59
Sam :
im thinking

13:59
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
swelling in the stomache
he mentions stacey

14:00
Sam :
possibly

14:01
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
showing me someone dissecting a frog lol random but true lol

14:01
Sam :
ok

14:01
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
mentions how he always would be in his rain proof coat
i feell he was outdoors more than in
who is he huni?
uncle
?
or grandfather

14:03
Sam :
I still have both my grandfathers but I have an uncle

14:03
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
in spirit?
uncle in spirit yes

14:04
Sam :
I dont know Ive not seen him in years.

14:04
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
gonna have to rush you huni cause ive got someone else waiting ok
ok
does he fit that description?

14:05
Sam :
no, not with that name

14:05
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
no the description?

14:06
Sam :
No

14:06
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
he shows me a women kissing a baby on the mouth ,i feel the baby died
the lady with him in spirit LOVED hats
and big flowers
on the hats
also shows me her spoilt pooch
im also shown an artificial limb
Derick and Al
the names will be linked to him

14:08
Sam :
wow I have an uncle Alb

14:09
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
right
ok
is this the one u havnt seen for years?

14:09
Sam :
I havent seen ALBERT (ALB) for years but hes in spirit

14:10
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
yes ok
dont u remember what he was like huni?

14:10
Sam :
yes, he had glasses.....

14:10
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
this is wo i have here :0)
he mentions someone always leaving shoe laces untied
or they dont tie them properly
and he wants them to be careful of a fall

14:11
Sam :
yeah abby. she would tuck her laces in but not tie them

14:11
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
he mentions someone is good at body art?
henna or tattooing
face painting
its something with body art?

14:12
Sam :
abby

14:12
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
oh really
lol

14:12
Sam :
her and alb were close

14:12
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
aw
he says you sould have gone to a private school, he feels your very clever
he says "dont no where she gets it from" lol
mutley the dog

14:13
Sam :
he did haha

14:14
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
he is putting a peg on his nose
who has diobetes?

14:15
Sam :
my grandmother has age on set but my friends dad does, his son is in spirit

14:15
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
?
always consious of the time
he was?

14:16
Sam :
YES very much so

14:16
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
scottish link?
is that with him?
is he refering to you with lists?
like OCD
lol

14:18
Sam :
Weird. My grandfather is scottish (with my grandmother who has diabetes) but the male in spirit (the son) in his items when he passed there was a scottish knife and hsi family
coudlnt work out why
YES Im forever making lists

14:18
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
bless him
ha ha and me re the lists
max
do u remember a cow or bull who was caught in the barb wire fense?

14:20
Sam :
No.......I know a few Max's though

14:20
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
and blindfolding a man in a cair?
this is what he showing me
he talks of his father being iterigated and queetioned being held against his will

14:21
Sam :
covering peoples eyes with hands?

14:22
Simonejohnson Awardwinning SpiritguideArtist
he says "did you know that on one side of your family they are famous in history for a soup?
i feel its a famous soup now
i have to leave it here huni ok
send him your love in your toughts now
he will ere u

14:23
Sam :
ok hun, trying to think now.....x

14:23
Simone
please save this reading ok
its so important

14:23
Sam :
any names for the younger male?

14:23
Simone
u need to ask family about the spirit messages
they will be able to confirm it for you
yur too young to know some of that info
everything i told you from your cards will happen in the order i gave it ok

14:24
Sam :
any names for the younger male?

*********************************************************************************

That was where my reading ended but I have made sure to save it and I will keep checking back on it to see what happens with it. 

Also as far as the genetics question goes

My dad

 Me

My mum

My sister

(judge for yourself) 



Thursday 9 May 2013

Spoke to a psychic today............

Now Im not one to usually participate in things like this, this is more Abbys doing.

But this morning I had a Facebook message about a reading she had booked for me so I thought I would humour it , if not keeping totally sceptical. I should also add she is not in my FB friends list and all my FB is kept completely private as I have my children's pictures on there etc.

This woman has never met me, never seen me, knows nothing of me or my life/health/family etc.

Yet she described me perfectly to a T. She told me of health issues within my family, about specific family members, names of family member's who had passed over, past events in my own life that no one, not even Owen knows about......

She then went on to tell me about past life's  and she could pick up on at least four.......FOUR! which she then went on to describe in great detail.

So it has now gotten me wondering and I tell you what the last month or so since my brother passed I have been having several stress related issues and problems but after having a reading from her I had this amazing sense of relief and almost like comfort.....which was the nicest feeling.

She also went on to read my cards and said in a future vision she saw me and my partner with our children on a farm.......now thats my dream.........so I am now more determined than ever to achieve it.



Monday 22 April 2013

A sad time...........

Hello All

Many readers will know from my past blog enteries the issues I have with my family. My life has always been very unstable and I was practically taken in and raised by family friends since the age of 4. I did live with my parents but with a dad in the RAF who was never home and a mother who had no maternal instinct whatsoever. When they divorced 11 years later it was a god send and I found my independence. The family friends who took us in years ago have followed us around RAF bases and raised us.

Their names are Chris and Barney and their 3 sons became like mine and my sister Abbys adoptive brothers - their sons are Dean, Stuart and Mark and I absolutely adored them.

In total I have 6 siblings, 4 brothers and 2 sisters.
Mark - 38 ----- dear friend who I look at as an adoptive brother
Stuart - 33 ----- dear friend
Dean - 29 ----- best friend and adoptive brother
Then there is me
Abby - 26 ----- actual sister
Jessica - 21 ----- step sister
James - 18 ----- step brother

Well on April 1st I had a frantic phone call from my sister to tell me that my brother Dean had gone to pick up our brother Mark to take him shopping, he had walked in and found him dead on his sofa. He was 38 years old. Dean phoned his parents and 999 and had to wait for them to arrive.

He was pronounced dead and from what they could tell he had been gone a few days.......so we have been picking up the pieces ever since. Dean and his family were in a bad way when I saw them the following day, understandably so and it really has rocked us all to the core.

The coroners report came back as 'unexplained death', they have no idea why he passed away or what took his life. Dean said he found him it was a if he had just laid down to have a cat nap because it looked as though he had been moving his living room around.

He was 38. An amazing man who pledged his life to the RAF. He has served 8 times in Afghanistan at Camp Bastian and some of the sights he had to see and witness Im sure must of haunted him to this day. His dad always says if you were to cut him in half he would have bled Blue. He loved his job, his family and his life and we are devastated to have lost him.

He is being laid to rest on May 3rd so at the minute we are all sort of in limbo. His family are having him cremated and then once they receive the ashes back they are going to have a private moment and scatter his ashes in the memorial garden......

He was always the one when my parents divorced who was waiting with open arms whenever they had argued and I need a cuddle to get away from it all. He was my sanctuary and my strength. His kind words, love and wisdom are what got me through some of the worst years of my life.

He will always be my hero and He will be sadly missed

Love you Mark

x x x x


Tuesday 26 March 2013

So Norovirus.........we meet again..........

.....and yet again its taken my little princess

Exactly the same symptoms............exactly the same way

She was first poorly Sunday night whilst I was in work......

Then when I got home at 10pm she was sleeping soundly.
At 11pm when I went to bed I could hear her coughing, 2 minutes later she was sick
Brought her into our bed, 10 minutes of sound sleep, followed by coughing, then her crying, so we quickly moved her and sure as the sun rises, she was sick again.

Sunday night/Monday morning saw a blur of sickness, coughing, crying and me and her spending the night on the sofa.
At 5.30am when the dog did his usual howling trick I could have quite happily drop kicked him into the garden and left him there........but I'm not that mean.

Yesterday was full of mummy cuddles so I did nothing productive at all but I have found out that Mabel is very mummsie in her way. Everywhere Holly went yesterday, Mabel went. Holly slept, Mabel slept, Holly ate, Mabel ate........and so forth. Her and Holly are very close since the day we brought Mabel home, she would sit wrapping her up in blankets, just sit next to her bed and stroke her and she would sit hand feeding her dry biscuits (which we tried our best to deter her from doing) but it has obviously not gone unnoticed by Mabel.

Here is a few photos of Holly and Nurse Mabel yesterday



As I type this Holly is sat on my lap wrapped in her favourite blankie (the pink one in above photos), she's been up maybe 45 minutes with a very unwelcome dirty nappy, had a few mouthfuls of cereal and is now subdued possibly about to fall asleep again, Mabel is curled up right next to me......under Holly's feet. She's still a bit warm but her temperature is no where near what it was yesterday.

Ben bless him has been good as gold.......so I think a packet or two of his favourite stickers may be in order when Im next in work. He also brought me a gorgeous daffodil plant that he planted himself in school with the Marie Curie Pots of Care programme.....so it is now sitting happily on the front room windowsill

Which reminds me, two things happened in work Sunday, the first was I had these two videos sent to me from Owen

Id call that progress with the dogs. I should add that Mabel we think is starting to stop bleeding but we are aware that she still is fertile afterwards which is why they are still separated by the gate in the first video.

Bruno and Mabel progress...... :-)

We both do not want to add to the doggy population either which is why the dogs have supervised contact when the kids aren't around (mainly when Ben is around but Holly's is in bed because she is a little whirlwind and tends to want to play and winds them both up) or are separated at the minute. Plus for those who don't know Mabel's story please check my February blogs, she was meant to go in for neutering last week but because she came into season and we are unsure of her medical history and exact age we were advised to leave her have this one as it may have been her first, either way she is being neutered ASAP as the vets will not touch Bruno because he is 12 years old and has seizures.

Second bit of Sunday good news is there is a supervisors position going in work, my workmate Chris (who is already a supervisor) has hinted that two people are being taken on to cover it and whilst a workmate Luke is hoping for one, the other is two shifts I already do.....and I worked with our main boss on Sunday as there was no available cover and according to Chris who saw him yesterday he was singing my praises. I am considering applying for it but realise I am not as trained up as some others in the shop but I know how to lock the shop up (besides banking the notes) and the code to alarm the door. Other than that I know how to do everything else. My hours would go from 12 to 17 so I would qualify then for working tax credit and my hourly wage would go from £6.20 to £7.80. so all round it would help us out immensely.........it would also help with my future CVs if I have training etc I'm just not sure I want to be supervisor in the shop because the amount of grief we get occassionally is unreal and we are due to have extended hours soon too.

Things to think about I guess..........

Today mainly will consist of baby cuddles, Ive just enjoyed a bacon sandwich for breakfast and Im hoping if she does go for a proper nap later on that I can get out and clean the rabbits out as with the torrential rain last week and the cold weather and baby being ill they are in desperate need of cleaning out.

I also got rid of a fair few bits yesterday with the council. The spare hutch has now gone so I have space on top of it that Im hoping will be a good place to put my cloche and seedlings - its in the sun trap and sheltered all round and no bunnies can eat it.

Right best be off, mummy cuddles and Mr Tumble are calling

x