Sunday 29 July 2012

Let the nightmare commence.....

Morning all
Well I woke up Tuesday with a dental abscess hence the lack of posting - thankfully it has given me no pain as apparently its draining (I bet you really wanted to know that)  and still hasn't but they have told me I will need the tooth removing and a dose of antibiotics. 

Now for any normal person this is fine, but when you are straight edge, medication phobic and have severe anxiety this can be an absolute nightmare of immense proportions! I have been psyching myself up for the last few days to take them and was all ready to yesterday when my partner got delayed at work so I couldn't and as a result I ended up making myself sick with worry and dread.

So this morning after reading horror stories of dental abscess' I had to do it. I broke out in a hot flushes, dry mouth, shakes and this was before I even had the pill out of the packet - and yes it is one 250mg pill I have to take - hardly a horse tranquilliser. As soon as I took it I promptly burst into tears and had to remove myself to the garden for fear of the kids seeing me in such a state. 

I bizarrely too have this weird thing about 5 minutes....... so I'll tell you the story. My mum (should reiterate the reason I never mention her is we haven't spoken in 9 months) anyway.........she is exactly the same as me - hates taking pills or medication in any form and I clearly remember my dad when they were together having to force her to take medication, to the point of having to pin her down - it was obviously something she absolutely needed to take because my dad isn't a bully or a forceful person etc. - but I think mentally that has scarred me and worsened my own phobia.
Anyway I remember her telling me that if anything was going to happen, like a severe allergic reaction - you'd know within 5 minutes.....or there would be tell tale signs something wasn't right. So I take myself away for 5 minutes.....strange but it works for me.....I sit and focus on my breathing to bring myself out of a panic attack etc too.

Although in fairness I have been put on Amoxycillin, and it really doesn't help that my younger sister is allergic to penicillin and amoxycillin so my worry isn't completely unacceptable!

Anyway so since I seem to be ok - I took it at 9.33 and here I still am at 11.27 - my time before work today will mostly be taken up with reading this fab new blog that I have found 


It has already given me loads of ideas and is exactly the type of blog I like to read so I hope some of you will stop in and have a read too. 
                                                                                 x

1 comment:

  1. Welcome to my frugal world of no nonsense, buckle up and get on with it xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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